8.17.2006

We Don't Need No Education

What a life...no kidding. So many things have been going on for the last couple of weeks...it's freaking crazy. I feel like I've gone from having no clue about what's next for me to being thrown into situations that I don't have to be but because I'm responsible, I've put myself in. That made no sense, eh?

My mom has to have her gallbladder removed. Yeah, she has stones...major ones. Maybe after the surgery, when we get the stones back I'll take pics and post them...gnarly! Anyway, she is stressed because she has to miss work (she's a teacher). So, I told her I would sub for her class. I've seen her in action for a year since I volunteered last year, I know how to work with kids that age, and I have a college education. Plus, I'm practically my mom's clone (not in looks...look more like dad except for the cute nose and ears)...We even have nearly the exact same handwriting...our writing voices are similar...so much so that a prof we both had in college told us it was weird reading our papers because they sounded so much like the other one would write. Anyway, I digress...so I have thus ventured into the world of professionalism and gotten a job...sort of. I'm promised a couple of days for my mom, and I'm signed up with the school system, so I can call and check on jobs or have them call me...which means I'll likely sub more so I can make some money.
Wow. I have my first real job. Yeah, I know. I'm a spoiled brat...nearly 24 years old and I've never had a real job. I'm lucky, and I know it. My parents always put education first so that I would have a chance at getting a good job later on. They told me that as long as I stayed in school and did my best, they wouldn't make me get a job. So, I stayed in school, did my best (a 3.57 in college with a Bio degree, mind you), and I never had a job. I wouldn't have had time for one, with all my labs and studying. Sure, some of my fellow students had jobs, but it was difficult and their grades suffered. Anyway, point is, my parents are wonderful people who gave me an awesome chance.
And then, when I couldn't figure out what to do after college (work, grad school, professional school, what?), they gave me a chance to figure that out...which brings us to now. I have some good ideas in mind for the future. For right now, I have a job. And, I'm looking into some lab work at the hospital...there are some awesome openings that I think would be great for me (and good pay) while I figure out if what I'm considering doing next is what I really want to do (I'll fill you in on that some other time). So yeah...Ms Fish went out and got a job...yay!
An interesting side note to the job thing...after filling out my application and W4 yesterday at the BOE, I was driving home, and I had sort of a mini wreck. It seemed so much bigger at the time. See, I was crossing this busy street to go into this neighborhood. I forgot that this particular street has this huge dip where it enters the neighborhood. I wasn't even going fast...10mph...20 at the most but I doubt it...anyway, I hit the dip and BAM...yeah. It scared the freaking crap out of me. So then, my car stops working...I'm coasting along...can't turn the car back on...can't stop...brakes don't work...so I pull to the side, put the car into park, and pray to Jesus that it will stop and not hit anything. It stops. I jump out afraid it will blow up or something. (Have I told you that I'm a little psycho?) When it doesn't immediately blow up, I open the door, pop the hood and look under it. Nothing seems out of place, yet my car will not budge. I try to start it a couple of times. It won't start. So, crying like crazy, I call Alan. When he and Kyle get there, he calls my dad who calls the tow truck. So, we wait...me upset that I was so irresponsible even though it was an honest mistake, upset that it will cost so much money, afraid it won't be fixed and that will cost money to get a new vehicle or not have one at all and not be able to work when I finally have a job. Yeah. I'm a freak. Anyway, so they haul it off to the dealership. Turns out, stupid battery was bad. It's 6 years old...never replaced...it wasn't my fault at all. I mean, I did hit the dip, but that didn't do anything to the car (surprisingly)...see what I didn't tell you is that the car had been acting funny the last couple of days...not too bad, though...just a couple of times when I went to start it, it would not start the first time...but I didn't think much of it..was going to mention it to my dad that afternoon...but then it broke down. So yeah, they got me a new battery and did a couple other routine things (fuel injection cleaning or something and an oil change cause it was past its 3000 mark since we went to South Dakota and back). Not great to have to pay nearly 400 dollars, but at least it wasn't my fault. And, I've already decided that after I finish saving up to pay off the hotel bills on my credit card (nearly there), I'm going to give my parents whatever I earn from subbing for my car because they shouldn't have to pay for it...I mean, I know they want to cause they are parents, but I want to do the responsible thing...if I have a job, I should be paying for it, you know?
So I guess that's about it. I've rambled on for long enough. Hope life is well for everyone out there...I love my parents...they are awesome...and with that, I'm out for now <3

8.07.2006

Dangerous Liasons

I had a really good day today. It wasn't anything like going to a cool amusement park or playing a show in front of thousands of people or even winning the lottery and becoming a multimillionaire. It was a normal day...nothing totally out of the ordinary. But, something happened that was real nice. That's all I'm saying. That made my day awesome. Now I'm not so happy and not feeling so awesome. In fact, I'm pretty much bummed. I just yelled at two people I love almost more than anyone else in the world. No, not my parents. My boys. THE boys. Alan and Kyle. And, I feel like crap about it...but it isn't just feeling gulity and feeling bad that I yelled at them. They pretty much deserved it. That's the main reason I feel like crap. I feel like they don't always understand me and what I need or want...Sometimes I even feel like they take me for granted. Tonight, I was trying to read my e-mails quickly so we could go grab some food...instead of letting me do it and get it over with, they stood over me making comments and basically pestering me...and I lost it. I couldn't concentrate and I really wanted to hurry so we could go eat...and they were keeping me from it...and I yelled at them. I know. It seems stupid...it's stupid to get annoyed at them for that...it's stupid of them to annoy me like that...and it's stupid of me to be bummed now. But...sometimes the stupid things are the things that mean the most. I just wish people would be more considerate of me and take the time to consider my needs and wants...and just...think of me once in a while...I mean, I try to do what I can for them (and other people)...but I find myself being the giver in many cases...and it's not that I want to be reciprocated for every good deed...it would just be nice to be the one who someone does something nice for sometime instead of always doing stuff for other people and feeling like they don't care about you as much as you care about them. Bleh. Someone give me a pony.